Unfolding the blinded side

My thoughts spoke to me, my actions spoke for me, my writing narrated as my eyes witnessed, my feelings executed and you are receiving... Something hit me today, it hit me hard that it hurt, how much attention is paid to youg girls, young boys go through similar phases and we have the mentality that boys are just boys. I refuse to use the word guys or men at this point, because they are all inner boys, and they need to be heard, I'm talking to those who are boys, to those parents, to those friends, to those siblings, listen..... Dear young boy, we know about your struggles too, girls are known as people who cry, I know you try not to, it might be tears you think you locking, but it's actually pain you lock inside, those tears will set you free if you unlock... Dear young boys, we know girls have bff's to talk to, even journals, but amajita (guys) just tell you "hade ntwana" (sorry dude) and that's the end of it. You also need someone who will listen to you, no matter how ridiculous it might be, girls cry over such things often, and it helps... Dear young boys, there is no use to hide, you are not hiding alone, your troubles are with you, reveal yourself and let's see which trouble will be left, that will remain behide. Troubles are cowards, once you start facing them, they run away, don't keep them... Dear young boys, we know you also lose valuable things and people in your life. If you speak through rap, then do so, if you speak through dance, do so, if you speak through writing, do so. Losing people in your life is not easy, don't let silence close your mouth, open the gap and breathe in a world of pure humanity, don't think because you're a guy, you can't offload. Dear young boys, we don't know your secrete, but we will know it if you are willing to talk and we will find solutions. Many young boys get raped on daily basis, they are abused, left homeless, neglected and made feel less as men, standing up doesn't just give you confidence, you know...being "the guy", standing up is letting your pain sit down, for you are showing it who is the teacher. Dear young boys, your swag is nothing compared to the weight in the bag on your back. Talk let the man in you survive, don't seek for a role model, be one. And finally dear you, choose awareness not ignorance.

FRIENSHIPHOOD

I'm learning that frienship isn't like a stone that if you leave it there you will still find it, it is a plant that you need to water, it dies the moment you stop caring for it. Distance does put a strain because sometimes you don't want to talk, just having your friends around to be there physically. Distance isn't to blame, there are social networks, even if they are online, there is no greeting, it's fading away like a mist, but mists fade to clear, this friendship fades to darkness. I remember how the four of us swore and made atruce that distance is nothing but a meter, maybe times 100, but still it doesn't count because love is stronger. Well it was something related to that. We tried to make movie dates, but one always cancelled, make another date to go to one of our houses but again some would withdraw. That was when I realised that with change, no matter how hard you try to make things stay the same, priorities change, even if yours don't, theirs' do. Memories are there to be a reminder, to always go through them if you want to cheer up, but these...these are just images, words are just words, you just wonder if they were meant. Especially when you realise that you are the one who always tried to make effort. When you stop, nothing and no one continues, you then begin to question. At the beginning of other new frienships you don't bother much because they are so much fun, but as time goes you realise that there is so much more that is missing, yes it's no competition, or comparison, but you realise that isn't much in common. Then I'd write in ma journal and tell, but now I write in my journal and that is it. One of those awkward moments when it is obvious that you are not on their A list, that you don't even see yourself on the Z list (if there is even one). You know you don't have real friends when you want to pick up the phone and call, you scroll through your contact list more than twice and you don't see anyone to call. I think one knows when friendship doesn't exist, but ignorance just strikes through and overshines the truth, it's little things that matter most. I sometimes wonder if perfect friends last only in movies, where people were friends since at birth, sometimes more than 10 years, and still going strong, and by perfect I mean that there are fights, but in the end they don't seem to matter. One of those moments you don't want a clean slate, because you don't know where to start or how to, but you know you are tired of old written pages. In the end, one has conclusions, but right now I don't because I believe conclusions are not endings but findings, I have not found a thing. Not confussion, just realisation!